Quotes

The most selfless time you can spend with your parent is helping them buy, then teaching them how to use their first smartphone.

LESSONS LEARNED:

1. Babyboomers want to read the manual at all costs.

2. My real purpose in life is to be a line of defense between my mom and those Best Buy workers.

3. PATIENCE

4. Passwords, Usernames, and Security Questions are real progress bandits. They are pitfalls that suck in your parents and make them begin to “MULL”…and when mulling ensues you know the next 5-15 minutes are a wrap.

5. SLOW DOWN. I think the biggest lesson I learned while helping my mom buy her phone and learn how to use it this weekend was appreciating the need to slow down. It’s different than being patient. Patience can sometimes mean just suffering through something with a polite smile or at the least, humoring a situation with finite placidity. I definitely had to employ patience this weekend, but in slowing down I was able to just really enjoy spending time with my mom as well as understanding that yeah, sometimes I should read the manual, question the sales people, read the packaging, save the packaging…the twisty ties…the little baggies, use scissors instead of teeth and nails when opening things etc. Slowing down really helps me appreciate the moment.

 

This I Believe

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Nike’s are for Action, Toms are for protests

My son is the most Toms loving boy ever! I TRIED to force some Jordans, Lebrons, KDs even Roshe’s on him and he was NOT having it. He only wants his pseudo ninja shoes. I have nothing against Tom’s but they have about as much traction as the inside of an Oreo Cookie. Actually the soles of them look like Oreo cookie cream topped by fabric wrapped feet. Anyway they’re cheap so who am I to complain?

tom t tom tom tommmms

 

Nike’s are for …

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Do Over

Inconvenient Truth #5762: “Your Kids don’t care if you’re a single parent, neither does dinner”

Inconvenient Tr…

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Inconvenient Truth #1455: Thou Cannot Parent in skinny jeans.

Prove me wrong. Try peeling your kid off the floor in the toy aisle after they slither out of your arms using the evasive demon noodle boneless slump trick.

Inconvenient Tr…

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apparently my heated blanket is made out of boyfriend material

-raki

apparently my h…

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FACT: In public, A well behaved yet ashy child, reflects worse on you as a parent than a loud mouthed lotioned one.

i didn’t say it was fair, but it’s true. 

FACT: In public…

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I’m about one peanut butter and jelly sandwich dinner away from being an unfit parent.

I’m about one …

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